These Two Fears Can Kill Your Ambition
Warning: You Need to Act
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We all have, at least, one ambition. A Vision. Except that there is indeed a brake that can prevent you from moving towards this Vision.
You've already felt it, right? That moment when your brain races, when an idea arises, when everything seems clear. You see yourself moving forward, you feel the momentum... and suddenly, nothing. You hesitate. You doubt. And you end up burying this ambition that could have changed everything.
It was not you who killed him. This is your “Dream Killer.”
What is the “Dream Killer?”
Imagine that you are projecting a vision that goes beyond anything you have done so far. You worked, you proved that you were good. And there, you want to play in another league.
You have a clear idea: launch your business internationally.
Not just scale up a little. No. Go to a real level. Test other markets. Become a solid, visible, recognized actor.
And you know it, deep down: you have the level. That your current activity is part of your zone of genius. You have the skills to get there.
And yet, as the idea becomes concrete... you start to resist, to doubt.
And little by little, you start to believe that it’s stupid, that it’s never going to happen. That you get ideas. That you have to come back to reality.
That’s what the “Dream Killer” Effect is.
The Dream Killer is this invisible force that pushes you back before you’ve even started. He makes you believe that it's for your own good, that it's realism. But no...
The 2 Fears that can kill your ambition
Fear of rejection
Fear of rejection is a primary mechanism. Your brain is wired for this.
In the cave era, if the tribe rejected you, you were dead. Literally. No one left to help you hunt, to protect you, to survive.
We grew up in a world where we are told that “others know better than us”.
That if we want to go far, we have to be validated.
That if no one has yet done it like us, maybe it's not a very good idea.
You really want to launch this Company internationally. But in your head, you already have the worst scenario: we will judge you, criticize you, maybe even ridicule you.
So what do you do?
Either you do nothing (and you find a concrete excuse to justify it).
Either you do small (just to not risk too much).
Or you're doing bad (because you half believe it).
But, we're not going to lie: it shows. You can hear it. Others feel that you yourself are not convinced. Result: the rejection you feared... in part, you provoked it.
Matthew Lieberman, a neuropsychologist at UCLA, conducted a study where he asked participants to play an online game... except that after a while, they were voluntarily excluded by the other players.
MRI scans show that their brains reacted as if they were being punched. fist. Not a metaphor.
Rejection activates the same areas as physical pain.Fear of change
Our brain hates change.
Because Change = Unknown
Unknown = Discomfort
Discomfort = Danger.There is a notable scene in The Dark Knight Rises. Bruce Wayne is locked in an underground prison. The only way out? A wall to climb. Some people almost get there… but always fall in the same place.
Why? Because they use a safety rope. And this is precisely what is holding them back. Without this rope, they would have no choice but to go all out.
This is what the guard explains to him:
“You will only be able to jump if you accept the risk of falling.”
In reality, change is often experienced this way. We want to evolve, PROprogress... but without losing what we have built. However, all change implies a part of the unknown.
Human beings prefer familiar discomfort to an uncertain unknown. Said psychologist Daniel Kahneman.
We overestimate what we risk losing. And we underestimate what we could gain.
It's not irrational fear. It’s a self-preservation reflex.
Why Vision is essential here?
Have you noticed? When you know exactly where you're going, there's no stopping you.
But when it's unclear, everything becomes an excuse. You may have understood that it is partly because of the DREAM KILLER.
The two fears are so powerful, but they are not “Invincible”.
What can overcome them: is the Clarity of Your Vision.
Vision is a clear direction, a precise representation and embodied of the future you want to build. A strong Vision works like a navigation system: it filters out unnecessary doubts, refocuses your decisions and prevents you from being tossed around by your emotions or the opinions of others.
When your brain clearly visualizes a possible future, it does not treat it as a simple idea. He begins to consider it as a reality under construction.
Theory of "Possible Selves" (Markus & Nurius, 1986): The more your brain projects itself into a specific future, the more it activates motivation and emotional regulation mechanisms.
In other words, when your Vision is clear, your brain puts in place strategies to bring you there naturally.
Your Vision must be yours. Not what we expect of you. Not one that checks the boxes of what is socially acceptable.
→ Be You, The Real You
A strong Vision requires you to take 100% responsibility for your choices. When you know where you are going, you no longer let your fears or the opinions of others dictate your actions. You become the decision-maker of your own trajectory.
→ Be Your Real Boss
Vision's clarity breaks down mental barriers. It's not fear that limits you, it's the lack of clear direction. The clearer your Vision, the more you naturally push your own boundaries.
→ Be Your Own Limits
Vision is part of my Framework: The Mastery Compass Framework™. And this Framework is part of my SoloBOOST™ method that you can discover in SoloBOOST Academy™.
Rejection hurts. Change is scary. And the more you think about it, the more reasons you have to wait.
We don't give up suddenly. We get used, one day after another, to a future that is smaller than what we really wanted.
Tell yourself that it’s normal to be afraid. It's normal to feel fear. But, fear can also make you grow, if you know how to use it to your advantage.
So, if you want to realize your Vision, allow yourself to Undertake at the Height of Your Ambition, I invite you to really see where you have the power to move forward.
You have no power over the judgments of others, over what we are going to do. say about you. But you have power over how you will react and no longer suffer.
Remember that you cannot pursue a Vision that you do not see. And that Clarity is power.I have prepared a Quiz to help you identify if you are clear with your Vision. You can read it, and receive your personalized report, with your Score, and what can be improved….
Receive my personalized report
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